Contact: Kris Titus Phone: 1-888-345-2262 ext. 703
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
April 24, 2009
For Immediate Release April 24, 2009
April 25th is Parental Alienation Awareness Day
This
year represents the 4th annual parental alienation awareness day. A day
that receives more recognition each year and deservedly so.
F4J Fathers 4 Justice Canada
recently sent two of their Directors to attend the Canadian Symposium
on Parental Alienation Syndrome.
The Directors of our group recognize the signs and behaviors all too well.
"We've become complacent in
society. when we see a parent being belittled on the tv or in cartoons,
we think it's funny. I assure you that the real life alienation of a
child/parent relationship is tragic," says Kris Titus, National
Coordinator for F4J Fathers 4 Justice Canada.
The organization receives calls and
emails from parents across the country who are being alienated from
their children. Denial of access is a weapon of choice in family law
disputes and affords a custodial parent uninterrupted time to influence
the child.
Mike Murphy, a Fathers 4 Justice Director says, "Parental Alienation is a tragic form of child abuse and can result
directly from our current dysfunctional Family Law (FLAW) court
system. It pits one parent against the other with the prize being the
children. We need a presumption of equal parenting to help
minimize the conflict and help the children. Its all about our children."
Mike runs a blog about parental alienation that is currently receiving almost 5000 hits per month.
Dr. Marty McKay said it very well
at the Canadian Symposium on Parental Alienation, "Anything not joint
physical custody is moving towards alienation."
A warning we should all heed.
CONTACT: Nationally, Kris Titus 1-888-F4J
Canada
( 1-888-345-2262 ) ext. 703
National Website for more information about F4J Fathers 4 Justice Canada Canada:www.f4jcanada.ca
Vellacott recognizes Parental Alienation Awareness Day
April 25, 2009
OTTAWA - "Parental Alienation is a serious problem in Canada because
too many children do not benefit from the active involvement of both
parents in their lives," said Conservative MP Maurice Vellacott
(Saskatoon-Wanuskewin), speaking in recognition of Parental Alienation
Awareness Day.
April 25th is Parental Alienation Awareness Day and much more awareness
needs to take place around the impact of parental alienation today.
Canada's high levels of divorce and non-traditional family arrangements
often result in situations where children are no longer able to benefit
from the consistent nurture and guidance and love of one of their
parents. In most cases, though not all, it is the father who is missing
from the home. Canada's family law system often makes matters worse,
which is why I have been working on a Private Member's Bill that would
require Equal Shared Parenting to be treated as the presumptive
approach for resolving custodial arrangements among divorcing parents.
A new study has been released by Prof. Edward Kruk of the University of
British Columbia using Canadian data. His research confirms conclusions
that have already been well-established from much research around the
world. Kruks' report notes that 90 percent of runaways grew up in
father-absent homes, as did 71% of dropouts and a majority of those
identified as depressed, suicidal, addicted and pregnant teens.
"Barring cases of abuse and neglect, the best interests of the child
include the active involvement of both parents in their nurture and
upbringing," said Vellacott.
A very important symposium on Parental Alienation took place in Toronto
in March. I commend all those involved in organizing this successful
and important event.
One of the many speakers at the symposium was Dr. Terence Campbell,
Ph.D., a clinical and forensic psychologist. He said that all
separations must begin with the premise that joint physical custody is
better than sole custody.
Many of the speakers at the conference were women, including Dr. Marty
McKay, also an advocate of equal parenting. She expressed distress at
the way many professionals contribute to Parental Alienation among
children in broken homes. She listed the whole spectrum of
professionals involved in divorce and custodial situations: judges,
lawyers, assessors, psychologists, mediators, child welfare agencies
and domestic violence agencies.
"I wish every success to those involved in raising awareness of the
trauma of parental alienation," said Vellacott. "I hope my Private
Member's Bill will move Canada in a direction that reduces parental
alienation and advances our country's support for the best interests of
our children."
- 30 -
For further comment, call (613) 992-1966 or (613) 297-2249
Lets
keep it simple. It is a persistent series of behaviors by someone,
usually a parent, to denigrate, bash, insult, reject and otherwise
treat in a negative fashion a target, usually the other parent.
Other
extended family members can get involved to exacerbate and accelerate
the process. This conduct is undertaken by both mothers and fathers and
is most prevalent in a divorce or separation.
Personal experience shows
it occurring prior to separation if the home situation is acrimonious.
Some spouses, in an attempt to gain allies, recruit their children
prior to break-up and use them to get a leg up in divorce and custody
battles.
The actions of the alienating parent can
be subtle or overt. Some parents do not realize early on the impact of
their actions on the child or children and others do it deliberately
knowing full well the desired outcome.
Dr. Richard Warshak, a leading
expert on PA states, alienated children relate to one parent, but not
the other, in a consistently negative manner.
The children will insult
you continuously often using the very words the alienating parent
stated to them to describe you. They will bad mouth you to friends, not
want to be seen with you, particularly around their friends, and will
tell you frequently what they do related to the home they occupy with
the alienating parent is none of your business.
This includes school,
medical, dental, extra curricular activities and especially their
social relationships with others. They are completely loyal to your
former partner and the target is the enemy. In the worst of cases the
child will lose all memory of your extended family and will even impact
their recollection of older siblings who were the targets children with
another wife even if there was a very close relationship beforehand.
When the latter happens the child may well be suffering from what Dr.
Richard Gardner and others since him have termed Parental Alienation
Syndrome (PAS). This is a condition where the child has rejected the
other parent completely without justification by the actions described
above from the other parent.
These are mostly feminists
or their sympathizers. It can take a long time for a particular
disorder to go in the DSM. Tourettes Syndrome took decades upon
decades. Homosexuality used to be in it as a disorder. It was removed.
The following is the American Psychological Association (APA) http://www.apa.org/official position on it at this writing.
The
American Psychological Association (APA) believes that all mental
health practitioners as well as law enforcement officials and the
courts must take any reports of domestic violence in divorce and child
custody cases seriously. An APA 1996 Presidential Task Force on
Violence and the Family noted the lack of data to support so-called
"parental alienation syndrome", and raised concern about the term's
use. However, we have no official position on the purported syndrome.
They
do, however, have a good deal of information on PAS on their site and
recommend some of Dr. Gardners books in terms of trying to evaluate a
patient
On
this site it will explain to you how to volunteer in your community to
help get a proclamation. On this page you can get a very good idea of
how the movement toward creating greater awareness is growing world
wide based on events on April 25, 2006-2008. http://www.paawareness.org/events.asp
The following is a direct quote from the web site.
If
more people knew about how Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive
parenting works, and how damaging these behaviors are to children, then
more people can help deal with the problem.
With
awareness and education will come social change. Just as now one can't
slap a child, or smoke while pregnant, without everyone knowing that is
not acceptable behavior, when social change happens, parents behaving
in parental alienation or hostile aggressive parenting behaviors will
be recognized. These adults will understand how their behavior hurts
their own children, and if they choose to do it regardless, they will
not be able to get away with their behavior as easily as today.
There
are many professionals such as judges, lawyers, psychiatrists,
teachers, police officers, as well the general public that have no idea
this problem exists, or if they do, don't realize the harm it does. The
aim of the Awareness Day is to make everyone aware of these problems
and encourage the alienating, hostile aggressive parents to seek help.
With
awareness comes education, and with education, comes the power to stop
the mental and emotional abuse of children.-Sarvy Emo
You can get a lot of good information directly from http://www.paawareness.org/.
The founder of this International group, Sarvy Emo, is a Canadian from
the GTA and a most helpful, even handed person despite the emotional
component of being alienated from your child or children. Therein lies
the answer to those of us who have experienced this incredibly and
excruciatingly agonizing form of both child and parent abuse. It is
hatred toward a target parent using innocent children as a pawn. We
know it exists and we have seen the symptoms first hand.
If
you suspect you are being alienated do not be passive. It is your worst
enemy. Giving your partner time to continue the alienation process will
result in a harder job for you to recover your childrens loving
feelings. Read everything you can on the internet relating to PA,
especially from those who have gone through it. There are many good
books on it. One I've come to rely on is Dr. Warshak's Divorce Poison.
What he says in it is from practical experience in his practice and an
alienated parent can identify easily with his case studies. He offers
helpful suggestions on counter acting the problem.
A Sample Letter for your Political Official
Dear (X)
April 25th is designated as Parental Alienation Awareness Day.
Official
proclamations have been made in many countries, states and cities
around the world. The event is active within the following countries
currently. Austria, Australia, Belgium, Bermuda, Canada, Czech
Republic, England, Germany, Italy, Mexico, Poland, South Africa, United
Kingdom, and the United States. Within the U.S.A. 17 States have
proclaimed this day. The International Organization behind the raising
of awareness was founded by a Canadian woman and has grown steadily
over the past 5 years.
Perhaps
you are asking yourself what this thing called Parental Alienation is.
Clearly that is why we are wanting to raise awareness as it is not very
well understood and so we are eliciting your help.
Parental
Alienation (PA) is a form of child abuse that involves the systematic
persuasion and manipulation of children both overtly, and with subtle
behaviors that results in the destruction of a loving relationship they
once shared with a parent.
The
child can suffer "collateral" damage through simple exposure to the
conflict or if used as a weapon against the other parent.
PA
is a case of rage over reason, and inevitably scars all
involved-children, "target" spouse, and perpetrator. For the child,
such damage can last well into adulthood, a lifetime in some cases, and
be the cause of tragic consequences.
Most people do not know about PA until they experience it.
Parental Alienation Awareness Day has been organized for the benefit of both:
-- the children who may suffer Parental Alienation;
-- the adults on whom these children depend for emotional stability - their parents.
I
am asking you to give consideration to proclaiming, within your area of
jurisdiction, April 25, 2009 and each successive year following. The
websites for more information are here http://www.paawarenessday.org/ and here http://www.paawareness.org/.
Thank you
Yours truly,
Mike Murphy Sault Ste. Marie, ON
Just add your own name to the salutation
Sample PAA Day Proclamation
A sample proclamation for Sault Ste. Marie, ON follows where F4J member Mike Murphy will make the presentation on April 6, 2009 before City Council. He will be introduced as Ontario National Board member of Fathers-4-Justice Canada and a member of Parental Alienation
Awareness Organization. Any F4J member could volunteer to be the
spokesperson at their council meeting. Get in touch with Robert Samery
at Robert Sameryrsamery@paawareness.org or volunteer on the website here: http://www.paawarenessday.org/volunteer.asp
WHEREAS, parents in high conflict situations can find themselves waring over the children of the marriage, they may intentionally or otherwise cause the children to suffer from Parental Alienation; and
WHEREAS, some of the behaviours of Parental Alienation include speaking negatively about a parent to or before a child, interfering with parental communication and time together, discussing inappropriate information about; the marriage, court proceedings or financial matters; and
WHEREAS, these destructive behaviours can interfere with a loving parent and child bond, depriving children of their right to love and be loved by both parents; and
WHEREAS, these behaviours can be confusing, frightening and create a sense of insecurity well into adulthood; and
WHEREAS, awareness, education and understanding, play an important role in stopping the effects of Parental Alienation;
THEREFORE, I, Mayor John Rowswell, declare April 25, 2009, Parental Alienation Awareness Day in the City of Sault Ste Marie
Proclamations
Alliston, ON Adjala-Tosorontio ON Sault Ste Marie ON Burlington ON Saint John NB Calgary AB
Events
Alliston, Ontario, Zehr's Grocery Store, April 18th, 2009
Last month a major International conference on PA was held in
Toronto. Some of our colleagues in F4J Canada and the equal parenting
movement are presenters.
March 27 - 29, 2009
In order to qualify for your rebate, you will have to put the letters 'PAAO' after your last name when registering.http://www.cspas.ca
The
Canadian Symposium For Parental Alienation Syndrome (CS-PAS), is an
educational conference for Canadian and international mental health
professionals, family law attorney's and other professionals dedicated
to the prevention and treatment of Parental Alienation and Parental
Alienation Syndrome.
The
CSPAS was another great and momentous occasion that showed the true unity of
spirit in our movement. Attendees included leaders and members from many equal parenting minded organizations.
I
believe at one point I counted 38 people I knew in the room! What a great
feeling that was!
All
of the presenters and some members of the media made themselves very available
to us, often joining us for lunch or
dinner
and freely sharing their opinions, advice and their work on behalf of alienated
children and their target parents.
This
was no doubt a landmark occasion and will prove to be pivotal in further
entrenching the need for a presumption of equal parenting. A sentiment echoed
by several presenters from both Canada
and the US.
Lawyers
Gene Colman and Brian Ludmer were both
presenters at the conference.
We
would like to thank the Founder of the CSPAS, Joe Goldberg and the many organizers,
sponsors and presenters.
Our
movement enjoyed a great week in the media.
Download the Special Parental Alienation Syndrome edition of the CEPC Family Advocate newsletter with a summary prepared by one of our F4J Directors in attendance.
Parental Alienation thus far has only been cited in approximately 45 Canadian court cases with many different outcomes.
Here's a sampling for you to read.
Parental Alienation Syndrome - Canadian Court Rulings
Updated August 6, 2008
All
Canadian laws, including provincial, territorial and federal laws, and
many court decisions can be viewed for free on the website of the
Canadian Legal Information Institute at: www.CANLII.org
The reference to Carswell: Carswell is a legal information publisher.
Alberta
Elliott
v. Elliott, A.J. No. 74 DRS 96-05285 Action No. 4806-10272 Alberta Crt
of Queen's Bench, Jud. Dist. of Lethbridge/Macleod, Jan 25, 1996.
Elliott
v. Elliott, 1996 Carswell Alta 95, 193 A.R. 177, 135 W.A.C. 177, 27
R.F.L. (4th) 23 Alberta Court of Appeals. Nov 7, 1996 (Affirmed--Appeal
Dismissed)
Johnson v. Johnson, No. 4806-11508a, Jud Dist. of Lethbridge/Macleod, Oct. 09, 1997
British Columbia
McLelland v. McLelland, British Columbia Supreme Court Docket: Nanaimo 07907. 1999 CarswellBC 1706. July 2, 1999 http://www.canlii.org/en/bc/bcsc/doc/1999/1999canlii5131/1999canlii5131.html
Menard v. Menard, Sup. Ct of British Columbia, 2001 CarswellBC 1312; 2001 BCSC 430, Mar 21, 2001. http://www.canlii.org/en/bc/bcsc/doc/2001/2001bcsc430/2001bcsc430.html
New Brunswick
S.O.
v. S.C.O, N.B.J. No. 326, Proceeding No. FDSJ-400-98. New Brunswick Crt
of Queen's Bench, Family Division-Jud. Dist. of St. John. Jul 28, 1999.
Jefferson v. Jefferson, New Brunswick Court of Queen's Bench Docket: FDSJ-6408.95. 2000 CarswellNB 15. Jan 18, 2000.
Newfoundland and Labrador
Toope
v. Toope, 2000 Carswell Nfld 185, 8 R.F.L. (5th) 446, 193 Nfld. &
P.E.I.R. 313, 582 A.P.R. 313. Newfoundland Unified Family Court June
15, 2000.
Nova Scotia
Badakhshan v. Moradi, Nova Scotia Fam Court. 1993 CarswellNS 423;120 N.S.R.(2d) 405; 332 A.P.R. 405. Mar 2, 1993.
Ontario (Updated with the Turnbull and McWatt decisions March 2/09 as well as the search link on CanLii.org)
Rothwell v. Kisko, 1991 CarswellOnt 1326. Ontario Crt of Just. (Gen'l Div.) Docket# 36429/89, Mar 21, 1991.
Davy v. Davy, Ontario Court of Justice (Gen'l Div)Docket 92-gd-21948. 1993 Carswell Ont 1630;1993 W.D.F.L 1535. Oct 7, 1993.
Fortin v. Major, O.J. No. 3805 DRS 97-01672, Court File No. 49729/94 Ontario Crt of Justice (Gen'l Div: Ottawa), Oct 25, 1996.
Demers v. Demers, Ontario Superior Court, Docket: Kingston 54253/96. 1999 Carswell Ont 2621. June 8, 1999.
Orsak v Orsak, Ontario Superior Court of Justice Docket: 97-FP-234664. 2000 Carswell Ont 1574. May 5, 2000. http://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/doc/2000/2000canlii22529/2000canlii22529.html
Her
Majesty the Queen vs. K.C. Superior Court of Justice, Ontario, County
of Durham, Central-East Region, Court File No. 9520/01. August, 9,
2002. (Mohan Test)
Rogerson v. Tessaro, Court of Appeal for Ontario, Docket: C44199, May 9, 2006. [mentions alienating conduct but not "syndrome."] http://www.canlii.org/en/on/onca/doc/2006/2006canlii15126/2006canlii15126.html
Petternuzzo-Deschene
v. Deschene, Ontario Superior Court of Justice, Docket: 22661. 2007 WL
22984642007 (Ont. S.C.J.), Carswell Ont 5095. August 8, 2007.
[specifically mentions PAS and cites a description of alienating
behavior as abuse]
S.P. and P.B.D., Ontario Superior Court of Justice, Court File No. 22661. August 10, 2007. http://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/doc/2007/2007canlii31787/2007canlii31787.html
·J.K.L. v. N.C.S.,
2008 CanLII 30289 (ON S.C.) — 2008-04-22, Ontario — Superior Court
of Justice, child — severe PAS — parent — father — time cited
by 3 cases , Turnbull decision transferring custody to Mother, 13 year old son sent to therapy, Dr. Richard Warshak Expert Witness.
·A.G.L. v. K.B.D., Ontario Superior Court of Justice,Court
File No.: 99-FP-246860FIS, Date: 20090116, J. Mcwatt decision changing
custody of 3 daughters to father after 10 years of PA. Severe PAS, Dr.
Richard Warshak Expert Witness. Mother to be restrained from seeing
children for a time.
·S.G.B. v. S.J.L.,
2009 CanLII 4523 (ON S.C.) — 2009-02-06, Ontario — Superior Court
of Justice , arbitrator — father — children's best interests —
parental alienation — apprehension of bias
Stuart-Mills, P. v. Cher, A.J.., Sup. Ct. Quebec, Dist. of Montreal, No. 500-12-184613-895 (1991).
V. (L.) C. H. (E.), 1992 CarswellQue 169; 45 Q.A.C. 100; 1992 R.J.Q. 855; 1992 R.D.F. 316 Cour d'appel du Quebec, Feb 26, 1992.
R.M
c. B.R, [1994] A.Q. no 947. DRS 95-09809 No 200-09-000440-948
(200-12-042928-904 C.S.Q.) (Quebec, decision in French only) Oct. 28,
1994
R.F. v. S.P., [2000] Q.J. Np. 3412 No. 500-12-250739-004 Quebec Superior Court (Montreal) Oct. 13, 2000.
Saskatchewan
B.S.P.
and D.G.P., Queens Bench for Saskatchewan, Docket No. 005359 of 2006,
Battleford, Family Law Division, Citation 2008 SKQB 63, Feb. 8, 2008. http://www.canlii.org/en/sk/skqb/doc/2008/2008skqb63/2008skqb63.html
To get up-to-date information on your province go to http://www.canlii.org/en/index.php,
click on your geographic preference to the left, type Parental
Alienation into full text, type in decision date on left, 2008 (or year
you want) and then type 2009 on the right or leave blank. Click on
search.
PAA In the News
Books on Parental Alienation
Divorce Poison
(takes you to Dr. Warshaks Divorce Poison control Centre), Dr. Richjard
Warshak ( I recommend this highly, very up-to-date with helpful
remedies.)Check your library for availability.
A Kidnapped Mind,
Pamela Richardson, with Jane Broweleit, A tragic Canadian Story of PAS,
Pamela is a speaker at the PAA conference in Toronto in the Saturday
March 28, 2009 session.
Children Held Hostage,
Link takes you to F.A.C.T. website for a review. Dealing with
Programmed and Brainwashed Children, S. Clawer PHD, Brynne V. Rivlin,
M.S.S., Section of Family Law, American Bar Association
Cheated, Ron & Ariel Smith. A story of a father who would not give up on his alienated children. Ron founded “Children Need both Parents, Inc.
Save the Males,
Why men matter - Why women should care, Kathleen Parker. Kathleen was
raised by a single dad. She is an inspiration for fathers. The link is
to a blog discussing her work and the book.
A Promise to Ourselves, A Journey Through Fatherhood and Divorce,
Alec Baldwin. Set aside politics and read the book. Conservative
MRA’s call Baldwin names due to his Liberal politics. but his
experience has no politics. It is, for many of us, despite different
political outlooks the same terrible experience of alienation and court
injustice. The link is to the NY Times review of the book.
Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome: Breaking the Ties That Bind
, Dr. Amy Baker, A speaker at the PAA conference in Toronto in the
Friday evening session March 27, 2009 session at 8:00 PM. A book
signing follows at 10:00.PM. She researched adult children who were
subjected to PA and discusses the impacts on their lives. Her web site
was not working at this writing. http://www.amyjlbaker.com/
Excerpts from the book.
Characteristics of Adult Victims of Parental Alienation*
Parents are divorced 75%
They are divorced 58%
Suffered from depression 70%
Problems with drugs or alcohol 35%
Estranged from their own children 50%
What will F4J be doing for PAA Day?
Well, we can't tell you all our secrets but here's some stuff you can do.
Distribution of information on Parental Alienation April 18, 200 910:00am
Location:April 18, 2009 Zehrs and April 19, 2009 Zellers, Alliston, Ontario
We will be handing out information on Parental Alienation Awareness Day and Hostile Aggressive Parenting. We will also be handing out information on Father's 4 Justice Canada requesting support for EQUAL PARENTING in order to stop the HEARTACHE... INNOCENT CHILDREN OF DIVORCE!
